The Feline Territory

The best set of laughter i’ve ever had is always about the mistakes me and my girlfriends made. Basically, about the arguments we used to have, and, primarily, about dating the wrong guy. Its about living the moment when you were making some of life’s biggest mistakes, you will hit rock-bottom and feel so bad that it actually happen to you, and turning that into a laughable situation.

Somehow, when we were facing the problem, it was as if life was against us, and that we could never ever pass through that critical time of crisis. Like it was worst than the Iraq war, or the spread of famine in Africa. Have you ever felt that way?

Like you have been your most sincere self, but your dream guy cheated on you. And you cried and cried and cried like no amount of river could hold the amount of tears that came pouring down.

How to laugh about it: Laugh about the way he once combed his hair wrongly, or the times when you were so into him that you forgot about your individuality. laugh at youself and the clown you have made out of yourself. Then, boost your ego and uplift it high in the air by looking at yourself today and how good it feels like to own the liberation that you have, not chained down to the one guy who- at the end of the day- is just another human being.

Then, there was the time when you think you were dating the hottest guy on campus, and became every gal’s eye of envy, and you were happy, boastful, snobbish…. and most importantly, you ditched your girlfriends for him. Then, you dump him because he was just not good enough. Especially, when you found out he had the brain of a monkey.

How to laugh about it: Remember the time when you found out he had the brain of a monkey.

Then, there was the time when you so thought a guy you knew was the most beautiful being of God, spiky brown hair, flawless skin, tall, stylish and he knows how to wear a good pair of khakis. And you were so damn proud to walk by his side, hand in hand. But then again, you found out that he had the brain of a monkey.

How to laugh about it: Remember the time when he was leaning over the divider just to show to people the actual size of his ass. Also the time when you tried to play with his hair and he snapped at you because he wasted a canful of hairgel just to make sure it faalls in place.

How do you usually reminisce all those times of torture, wreckage and depression?

Do it the way i do- laugh about it. Laugh really really hard.

And the world inevitably becomes the best place to live in again.

Mine! Mine! Mine!!!!

http://msn.careerbuilder.com/custom/msn/careeradvice/viewarticle.aspx?articleid=519&siteid=cbmsnhp4504&sc_extcmp=JS_wi3_april05_advice

Dear Girlfriends and the rest of the world,

click onto the website above and read the tips.

Next, think about it.

Then, think about me.

And what i have conformed to.

And what i have not.

;o

The crowd cheered the moment he stood up. The crowd went berserk when he opened his mouth to sing.

A simple dude, no bangles dangling from his wrist, no shiny outfit, no baggy trousers.

To me, he looks like a typical uia student who are either a non-open minded law kulliyyah student, a bachelor in Arabic student, or an Islamic studies student. Soooooooo normal.

But to the Malaysian public, Mawi is the representation of every girl’s dream man. Pandai baca doa, pakai kain pelekat, kopiah atas kepala…………..

But then again, are Malaysians looking for an AF winner who can sing and dance and everything an AF wannabe can do, or are Malaysians looking for a role model in a kain pelekat?

This is a classic example of Malaysia’s fiasco towards Siti Nurhaliza- kampung girl with an award winning voice.

My point is, there is a trend in the making in the way malaysian in general are making their preferences in choosing their role models- to entertain them and to become big in the music industry. Most importantly, the likes of Siti and Mawi are not just on stage to "entertain" only, but are placed on the high pedestal to become real genuine role models- as in, respected individuals, a lot of hard working, inspiring personalities because they are so down to earth….. and most of all…… someone the Malaysian public can relate to.

Thus, we see now what exactly does the Malaysian public appreciate, and what attracts them the most- which is, a respectable personality. Bravo to the Malaysian public.

And bravo also to Mawi and Siti, who are not afraid to be who they are, in the ever glamorous and pressurising world of plastic superstardom that they have embraced. They remain the way they are when girls their arena are putting on clothes that exposes and guys their arena are jumping up and down in hip hop trousers. Call me a convential constitution, but these are pretty pretentious bunch of people.

I am not a fanatic fan of these two, just an observer trying to to observe the changing of trends. Hence, i have finally made some interesting observation.

As masters classes started, i begin to see my approach towards the world of knowledge in a new light. Finally, i’m able to explore my intellectual capacity again, after an 8-month break! This time, it is more relaxed and less pressurising, i am inhaling everything that i could from these courses and these teachings by taking my own sweet time………. let it be if masters will take 2 years or 3………..i’m gonna enjoy the ride, all the pleasure that it gives me, and every bit of its bitterness………

Friends and Lovers………. wish me luck, pray for my success….and stand by me.

I had to sit for an interview with my CEO yesterday for a permanent executive position, and it could not had happened at a more crucial and controversial moment for our ever-so controversial company.

Well, it had to happen, and i went with full force to make the best of things. It didn’t help that i was the youngest candidate in the chambers of Tengku Mahaleel, waiting for heavens to fall on my lap or for the hell to open its gates for me. In fact, i was also the one who has worked for the least number of months in the company. The other two candidates were married and contented, and i’m still a teenager in an office girl attire, screaming for help.

It was a one and a half hour of an encounter with the most important man in the arena of Malaysia’s automotive industry, and i was not willing to let go of this chance to make a lasting impression. If not for him, at least for me.

Among the drama that happened:

Mr CEO (without even looking at my well-powdered face) : Parvin, what kind of a person are you?

Me (being really, really honest) : I’m a persistent person, with a stubborn streak.

Mr CEO (finally looking up, interested) : Are you as stubborn as me? (snickered)

Me (laughing) : No, you beat me at that. Definitely.

Mr CEO: Parvin, tell me why should i make you a permanent member of the company?

Me (putting on the best "lets sell myself" image ever) : Because i am responsible for the future backbone of the company, the engineers who will make our cars in the next 3-4 years. I am the person behind the wheel wo could make it happen, because i have the choice to choose who goes into the company in the time to come. The spirit of our scholarship programme is to drive our recruitment policy to its maximim potential, and i will give you my maximum potential, to create revenues.

Mr CEO: (looking skeptical) From these 39 scholars that you are handling, tell me how many are Einsteins?

Me : (selling myself again) Today, 70 percent of them are Einsteins, but by the time they are recruited, a hundred percent of them will be Einsteins.

Mr CEO: (with his nose in the air) And tell me, how many of them can speak like you when they come to see me for an interview now?

Me : Now, i assure you at least 60 percent of them are able to speak like me-

Mr CEO: (cutting me off)- and so what happens to the rest of the 40 percent?

Me : I will guarantee you that the other 40 percent will be able to by the time they come for the interview, i will make sure of that, i can guarantee you they will give their best shot. 

* Our conversation goes on as he hear opinion and answers from the other two candidates, and he talks about himself, his daily routine etc etc. as i tried hard to look sooo downright interested and smiled the most pretentious smile ever. But it was worth it.

Mr CEO: So, i’m actually a very boring person, all i do in my spare time is drive on the track and read, read, read. I don’t need anything glam. I don;t wear pointed shoes like you (pointing to my Nine West boots that i bought on sale). My wife doesn’t like hanging out….

Me : (cutting him off) : Well, you are just facing a post-middle-age crisis.

Mr CEO : (laughing so hard he almost fell off his expensive leather chair): You English majors are all the same. You twist your words around, all the poetry, they all mean the same thing, but they sound over-flowered, so much drama, so expressive, so manipulative…

Me (loudly, pointing to him) : Yes, but thats what makes a good salesman!

Mr CEO (eyes wide open, with full grin) : Yes, exactly!

Me ( beamed wih happiness)

Mr CEO : So, its not always that you could afford an encunter with me. So, ask me some questions.

Me (arranging my ass on the hot seat) : I have a question. Among all the Proton cars that you own, which one do you like best?

Mr CEO (looking really interested to answer): I have two favourites. The Gen2 and The Savvy. I like the Gen2 for the ride and handling, and i like the Savvy for driving into the bust town- its practical.

Me (arranging my hands on the glass-polished table that looks like a million dollars) : Which one do you think is more sexy?

Mr CEO (laughing, then looked serious) : The Gen2. Its a beauty. Which car do you drive?

Me : A hot orange Gen2.

Mr CEO winked at me.

* And thats when i figured that i’ve rolled out my red carpets and won the battle. I passed.

Surprisingly, that encounter was not as nerve-wrecking or intimidating as i have imagined. I had worst encounters with my dad and my debate coach. Probably i had a lot of training with my typical Indian dad who will never let me win any conversation and who will let me down if i don’t present a logical explanation everytime i came up with a reason. And he bashes me worst than this CEO. Yeah, my dad puts me on the hot seat every single day of my life. My dad can be the most intimidating man ever. And he still is. My dad makes a family meeting with him feels like a United Nations congress. Even my CEO can never beat my dad when it comes to making me pee in my pants.

And my debate coach in uni (Dr. Arif) called me and my teammates to have the brain of a monkey when we did not perform an argument well, or when we did not get our facts right.

So, to Daddy and Dr. Arif, thank you for the bashing and the on-going trianing.

You made my moment on the hot seat a lot more beareble, and i felt like i was only cruisin’.

If i were to write a love letter, this is what it will sound like. So, friends, comment on it… cheesy, corny, sugary…. or just- straight from my heart?

Dear "The Love of My Life",

You are not ‘all that’, not all that handsome or intelligent or even impressive to begin with. And i can do so much better than to just settle for you. I can do so much better than you had ever given to me, or what you have in store for me. I have as much potential as you have, so much wisdom and so much love to give.

But, my definition of falling in love or being in love is not about choosing the best fish you found in the sea, and its not even about settling for second best because you cannot get no.1, but the way i set the rules of love, is merely simple and plain. Yes, i’m a glitzy person, i like anything that sparkles, like the biggest gems and the shiniest of all diamonds, and the most well polished car. But when it comes to love, i just want somebody who could bring the best out of me.

And i found that in you.

Me, i’m the one you chose, out of all the people, you wanted me the most. Lets keep on running, all the time, running all the time, with you right by my side. And i’m so sorry that i’ve fallen, help me up let’s keep on running, don’t let me fall out of love. Running….. do you thinkl we’ll make it? Let’s keep on holding hands and holding on to each other so we don’t get separated. Keep on pulling my hand.

Be the one that i need, be the one i trust most. Sometimes its hard to keep on running, isn’t it? We work so hard to keep it going, don’t let me want to give up.

So, babe, in this world, its just you and me, and we have nothing to lose. And thats the way i see it, and i can’t take my mind off you. Lets win this battle, walk through the fire together, the way we have done it before. Lets do it again, with extra protection shield this time.

Come back to me, come run to me from wherever you are, from the desert sands, come here and smell the rain again. Make me alive again, turn me into human again.

Because babe, the most painful thing in this life of mine is the fact of losing you to the boundaries geography has placed upon us. When you come here, we will live again in our world of no boundaries. Now, i’m stranded in this traffic called ‘lost’. Lost in my dream, in my worst nightmare. I’m hitting rock- bottom. And i need you to come back to me and pinch me to wake up.

Come back to me and pick me up and we shall fly into a world of our own again- on the magic carpet, into a whole new universe.

Babe, i don’t need you to make all my dreams come true. Destiny and i are already working hand in hand to accomplish that. With a little help from the department of good attitudes and extra persistency.

But i still need you. You- who thinks i’m ‘all that’. And when you think that way, i will start to think that way too. You- who thinks i’m the smartest person you’ve ever met even though i never read that many books anyway. You think i’m the classiest person alive, even though i could never afford to wear Gucci yet. You think i’m the most drop dead gorgeous even on my bad ‘tudung’ days.

Oh God, love is so painful when you’re not getting whatever you have bargained for, isn’t it?

Yours truly,

The one who will be waiting and waiting.

Life is a story to tell, and if i were to be 80 and a great grandmother at that time, i will tell a story about my foreign affair to my great grandchildren.

It was an affair to remember, because it was an encounter with the most good looking foreigner i have ever laid eyes on. Beautiful long eyelashes, pointed nose and an extremely genuinely amazing smile. It was love at first sight.

Beyond all those beauty and physical attraction, i was swimming into a relationship that has changed my perception about the human race and the boundaries that we human create because of race. I was so much a perky Malaysian and he was so much an outgoing Arabian.

When the affair started , my life became a Hindi movie. A delightful one, for sure. People always say that the Middle East is a thing of beauty because of the mystery that lies behind it, and i agree completely. My affair was a thing to be discovered, it was full of mystery and new changes, a reflection of different languages and culture, a new friendship that bloomed into a foreign affair. And i loved it, the adventure and the fact that two very different people could become the closest of friends and the best of lovers.

Everything about it was so foreign to me, and thats why it was unique, different and unimaginably beautiful Perhaps thats what it was an affair to remember.

It was not about the man, because he was a simple guy who wanted simple things in life. A good job. A loyal wife. A good family. A happy life.

But it was about looking beyond our race, the fact that he never saw me as a person who comes from another race, and i never saw him as a foreigner. For me, he was just a dude who was extremely patient with my dictatorially irritating manner, who thought that i was the smartest little girl he has ever met, and who thought that i was the most good looking girl he has ever set eyes on, who supported me to the fullest in my every ambition, corrected me from wrong to right with full love and grace, and was never disloyal. He was by far, the best thing that has ever happened to me.

To him, i was the pusher who pushes him to be the best student or the best employee he can ever be, and believed in all the plans he has laid out for his life, and i became the cheerleader behind his every chosen game.

In short, we were motivating each other at the prime time of our lives when we needed the most support to start the engine to the next stage of our lives, and i had him to be my backbone, and vice versa.

When he left for his home country, no bucket could ever fill enough the tears that welled down my blushe-ry cheeks. It was a Hindi movie of Kajol and Shah Rukh Khan- at the airport. It was more than that because it was real. That was the moment that i felt like my foreign affair has come to a hanging chapter. And that it might end forever. And i didn’t want it to end because i loved him to death. And he didn’t want it to end because he loved me to death.

Was i willing to change my nationality for him? My liberal way of life? My style of hijab and wear a niqab instead? To leave jazzy Kuala Lumpur for laid-back Saudi Arabia? I would say a definite YES with no turning back.

But thats what foreign affairs are made of, right? Two different people coming from two far ends of the world. We can combine our hearts and our goals in life, we can change our perceptions about each other’s race and we can adapt to each others’ differences…. but we cannot change where we come from.

I am from the hot tropical South East Asia. He is from the land of the living sands.

I asked a best friend of his one day: "Does cute Arabian dude miss me? How much?"

Mr Best friend rolled his eyes and pat my back: "He misses you like the desert miss the rain."

So he is the desert and i am the rain. We would meet, occasionally, but never too often.

The best thing about being in a public-listed company is that people will go WOW, OOOHHH…. when you tell them where you get your wages from. The next best thing about it is the perks you get from the company itself, like cheaper merchandises, cheaper cars, big bonusses…. and the list goes on.

But the best thing is yet to happen. The best-est thing about being in the no.1 car manufacturing company in the country is when your boss is heading for the gutters but the THE BEST PRIME MINISTER EVER IN THE DEVELOPING WORLD becomes the superman and flew to save the day.

Its feels like a battle to be won, and Mahaleel and Mahathir lay out their guns and faced it with full frontal.

So, i didn’t feel like it was just about being a Proton employee, where you work from 8 to 530 and you finish your task. Its a lot more drama than this. Its about politics and playing the game well. At this moment, it was more about defense, where the people on top defended their stand.

And i have to applause them for doing that. And i take great example for such action of theirs. Although there are still many flaws that i can see, in the system that we have, in the cars that we make, in the ideas that we portray, in the way we treat our customers. But other companies make the same mistakes too. But its never really glamourized the way ours are, because the man behind the wheel of our vehicle is the man who brought renaissance and revolution to our nation (wow, i sound soooo pro- Mahathir, kan?) Its what you call "normal".

Well, I’m not just pro-Mahathir because of the way he defended my good company. Mind you, my values and principles are not moulded overnite. Mahathir was the man who brought the OIC to Malaysia and therefore my good uni- UIA was established. And i’m thankful because of that. And Mahathir was also the man who made sure we did not land in great debts when the 98′ recession happened. Because of that, we are not inclined to be ruled by the World Bank, and because of that we are not facing poverty like our neighbouring Indonesia. And if there are things that i will thank him for, i will thank him for this.

Well, every situation is a playing field, and we have to play it well. And every day is a change of time, and life is still, very much a Pandora box.

Last week, they were kicking Mahaleel into the dungeon. Today, they’re pulling Rafidah Aziz into the chambers. Last week, the AP was an issue Mahaleel had to deal with. Today, the AP is the reason why Rafidah is asked to write a letter of explanation for. I wonder what will the headlines be next week?

So, my conclusion about being in a good company like mine is that you get to see all of this waves, all of this drama and accusations, on the headlines of the newspapers, in the conversations of the Malaysian public, and in the meetings i have with my colleagues over teh tarik. And i’m enjoying what i see, i’m learning from the chaos, the losses and the gains, i’m reading the chapters and i’m enjoying the ride……. and the saga lives on.

So we’re looking forward to 2012 when all the best jumpers and all the best runners will put on a good show. And they thought they have chosen the right venue, the right host. And they thought its the best thing in the world when they saw the sad faces of Paris citizens when they lost the bid. And then we saw the faces of overjoyed London-ers as they were announced the new glamourized face of the Olympics.

So 2012 was the next best thing. I was happy for them. I thought it might be fun, it will be awesome. Until the bus bombed.

When it bombed, i felt sorry fot the victims, sorry for the nation that was affected. Sorry for the people who were so excited, but now awfully wounded. And i felt disgusted towards those who implanted such fatal weapons. My biggest guess was that Paris-ians were so demotivated that they took it out on their best counterparts. Well, life is a guessing game, so at that moment, guesses were most welcomed.

But of course, even if Paris-ians were supposedly the biggest culprits, what is the most fashionable pointing-finger game you can actually imagine?

Yeah, point it to the Al-Qaeda, point those fingers to the Muslims.

And thats when i got disgusted again. oooops, they did it again. Bullshit. Must they do this every single freaking time??????? They have to be typical Westerners everytime, dont they?

The House of all Terrors does not lie behind the man who’s wearing the mask, or the man who is holding the weapon, but it lies in the human mind who is judgemental, and insecure in the most obvious manner. So insecure that their minds tremble when a blast happened and they could find no one else to blame but those people who they have affected the most.

You think its a big deal now that your people are bombed in the most central part of your city, huh? Well, what do you think the Iraqis feel when you fill in their nation will all your bloody troops and kill all their men and all their children? You feel 2012 is still a big deal now? Well, think again.

Britain took their troops out of Iraq right after the blast happened. Well, thats one good move they have ever done ever since 9/11.

What do i have to say for all this? I would say i don’t welcome terror, so don’t blast central London. But then again, you should not have blasted Afghans and the Iraqis either. So, serve you right for being retaliated. Serve you right that you now have to deal with the snipers.

And serve you right now that your mind is in terror.