The Feline Territory

Come 14 February, at my doorstep.

Who says love don’t cost a thing?

Its Monday morning, 7am. Everyone’s out to some suburban getaway. Still in my favourite jammies (the one with a cat cartoon with many moods), i slouched myself on the sofa, pillows on my left and right, switched on the wi-fi.

Immediately my favourite guy calls me on Skype, and i switched on mtv. The maid came knocking and made me breakfast as i surf today’s news. Hotdogs with beef salami with mustard and mayo!! I made my own coffee and Casey my fluffy white cat came kissing my cheek.

Fave guy sent some useful microsoft applications for me to check out to organize my savings and expenditures. I sent him what i saw on The Big Brown Bag.com that caught my eye.

The maid comes and asks if there’s anything to handwash. She even made sure the cats are well-fed. My unmade bed is with new covers and the curtains are neatly drawn.

I’m still slouched on the sofa, multi-tasking. Reading articles on the net, talking on Skype, licking mustard off my spoon and suddenly, Oprah’s on tv with Sarah Jessica Parker and the whole cast of the you-know-what show.

This is by far, the most perfect Monday morning that i’ve had for ages. The usual Mondays are always sad. So busy. I’d be awake at 6am to dress for work and start driving by 7am. Couldn’t decide to wear tweed or just black suits. That ‘oh-so-not-suitable-for-office’ tweaky sandals or that Aldo shoes that belongs to my twin. My eyeliner doesn’t work and someone must’ve stolen my best eyshadow. No time to work on the lips, so gotta do that in the car, while i’m driving on the freeway. Mascara too.

Sure enough, life is a nightmare when it gets mundane. When doing the usual thing, doesnt excite you anymore. Thats why, this morning is perfect.

Thats why, i’ve been doing a lot of thinking, and strategizing. And i realized, a chnage is in order.

I am 24. Will hit the quarter-life in two months. And i cannot continue living like this. Gotta earn more money and pay more bills and invest in something bigger. Go to more places and do a lot more weird things. I don’t have to get into any more different relationships, i just need to change the way this relationship that i have. I just need to transition everything.

What i do as an occupation has got to change to make sure what i learn today is entirely different and a lot more fulfilling than what i learned yesterday. What i read in the news today shouldve given an extra impact on me, not just to flip over the pages. Watching Oprah and Sarah Jessica does not necessarily mean i gotta adore the show with NYC as the background and the clothes they wear. Its entertaining, but thats where it stops.

And thats what makes this morning perfect. That i was given the chance to be pamepered, and also the chance to think about whats missing, and what i need to do.

To count the hours…. theres a lot to do.

I have not written for ages. Its almost sinful. But somehow, it was rather a combination of having a ‘writer’s block’, an occupied mind and a demanding bf.

At the end of it all, perhaps i wanted to write for a reason. Like you would read and say…’wow, this is a blog worth readin’. Sometimes i would type away… then edit…edit…edit… like a crazy editor.

Besides that, i’ve been occupied with a part-time hobby. Just call it, a painter’s enthusiast. And i paint… faces. Soon, i’ll have a grand business card, thanks to my MR.Business School, who says…. i must create revenues…. if you invest in something…. you must get a 150% return… then i’s worth it.

Besides being a walking business school, he’s also a walking internet-savvy software engineering graduate. So, ladies and gents, Skype is the so-called biggest new thing that hit the planet its talking and talking and talking for hours for free……. kinda irritating when you can even hear the person on the other side flush the toilet and gosh…. the gory details… but, this thing is a blessing, makes life a lot easier for long distance communication..

So, i’m single and available again…. now that Harvard dude has left for school… but also left me with a lot of homework… if i may share the list:

to-do in 6 months:

1. Look for a house in TTDI or Bangsar.

2. Look for a service apartment near KLCC, where his office is gonna be.

3. Finish and excel in my face painting classes. Get a list of clients.

4. Do a good job on his cousin’s face for her merisik, engagement and wedding.

Of course, i have my own smart ways of manipulating things…heheh.

Call a property agent, shoot emails, let them do the work. Any place that soumds trendy and practical, sweep them into the top list.

Most of my girlfriends are 25-ish, of a good marriageble age, automatically they know who to call for a quick painting job.

His cousins and aunties and uncles and brothers and sis in laws adore me way better than they adore him Nobody will complain of a paint gone wrong

So, i’ve been occupied

Always up to NO good, and always stirring the evil potion with long fingernails in the big, hot, black pot.

Its like that scene i used to do in Macbeth… do you smell blood…? hehehe come thunder, rain and lightning….

Too much hocus pocus… i need to stop and turn a page Writer’s Block sooooo really drained me outta my senses!!

The Box

The Tools

And the MIND behind it.

Geez, sounds like a sophisticated ad……….

Somehow i am not able to welcome 2006 so perki-ly as much as i wanted to. Presumably bcoz all that will happen this year would be a result of what i have done last year. Either that, or how i can change the things for this year, contrary to what i have done last year. Or, i can hold my head high and say that things will be awesome this year, no matter how bad things were last year.

I refuse to think that things were so bad in 2005 and try to reflect on the happiest moments, such as my Convocation, rock-ing life with Harvard dude, having Radin back in KL, graduating from uni, having Abudi back in KL, buying my car… and many more.

Because really, a lot of unhappy things did happen to me last year. And those who know me well knows how bad things were, and still are.

So i needed to get out of this messy thoughts and meet the man of my dreams last nite. RESHMONU. ONSTAGE. SINGING MY FAVOURITE SONGS.

If there was anything better on New Year’s besides having Harvard dude, Radin and Mass by my side to party at the street concert, it was definitely wild to watch Reshmonu live. Live in front of me!!!! I love you Reshmonu!!!! You should’ve married me instead!!!!!

But anyway, i welcome 2006 with open arms. This is the year i will turn 25, InsyaAllah, if God-willing.

And every year, i tell myself that i will make changes and i will succeed. And i will do things better and sometimes i do.

There are a lot of things that i found out about myself last year (2005). I realized that its good to be stubborn, and not do as elders tell you to, because many times they think they know whats best for you when you know that they actually don’t know you at all.

How can they decide for you when they don’t even know you? Why let them decide when you’re grown up enough to shoulder your own sins?

And its good to really show your true colours, because then others would not be calling you a hypocrite.

Take full advantage of your young life, do as much as you can, learn today like there’s no tomorrow. Make mistakes and get up when you fall, live life to the fullest and don’t say you are happy just to keep people quiet because people will never be quiet even when you say the contrary.

Its easier said than done. But this is what i did in 2005.

And will continue doing so in 2006.

I know that everyone will hope things will be better in 2006, i hope for that too… but i somehow don’t see that happening. Perhaps i’m beginning to see life in a more realistic approach. Maybe its the ‘age’ thing. I’m turning 30 in 5 years. The clock is ticking. Maybe its what 1 year of working life has proven to me. Maybe because Harvard dude has finally able to knock me outta the fantasy world and told me to start living the real life.

That life is not always a bed of roses. So 2006 won’t be a bed of roses. It will have its thorns, just like the other years.

But maybe, just maybe, i’m able to face it with full frontal now.

And with this shield and will in mind, i began to embrace the new year, along with, of course, a few other things that comes in handy:

Behind every great woman is a great man

Girlfriends light up my life

Girlfriends+good food= In Good Company